IF my dear brother hath anxiously expected a line from me, I think by this time that patience must have had its perfect work. But he knows that I am a man of much business, and have but little time to spend or to spare; and sometimes when I have time I have no matter, of course no head nor heart for the work. For when we are forced to pull, to pump, to squeeze, and to press, it is hard work, and the contents as dry as a basket; but when the spring arises and overflows, then the head is like a bee-hive sending forth its swarms, while the pen labours to keep pace with the thoughts: "Counsel in the heart is as deep waters, and the words of wisdom as a flowing brook."
This spring is at times shut up, and this fountain is often sealed, but when the good Spirit opens and stirs the spring, and unseals the fountain, then it rises, runs, and refreshes, so that every thing lives where this river of life cometh. And we are astonished at the wonderful fountain, never suspecting there was such a wonderful source within, the treasure affording both things new and old. I am at this time an invalid, have been unable to march, or to use my arms, and therefore was thrown up upon the baggage wagon, and am now in the hospital among the sick, poor, wounded, halt, lame, maimed, and bruised, but hope shortly to be able to appear again in the field of action, or else the Philistines will shout, supposing the ark to be taken.
I have been now about twenty-four years without the camp, bearing his reproach, and hope not to be dismissed without a pension, having served so honourable a captain. But long marches, bad winter quarters, short allowances, stoppages, and perpetual skirmishes, have much weakened and impaired the earthly tabernacle; however I hope to die in the field, and never to desert the standard, nor the banner of everlasting love. Truth hath hitherto been my shield and buckler, and the Lord of hosts, mighty in battle, hath stood by me and brought me off more than conqueror, so that none could ever say, we have prevailed against him; and I believe and hope they never will. Sore engagements have I had with devils, a long and lingering war with the old man who hates peace, with this enemy there is no flag of truce, no discharges but by death. As to the world and I, we are well agreed, that is sick of me, and I of it, they will shout when I am gone, and so shall I.
But hypocrites in Zion are the worst foes, for they come in the garb of friends, war in the heart, but words smoother than oil. These generally betray, or stab you to the heart with a kiss, as Joab and Judas did; but surely there are none so abhorred of God, none in such a perilous state as these. A hypocrite in Zion is worse than a devil, and we abound with such in our days, especially in London, where the generality of ministers foster, nourish, and bring up nothing but such. I hope to have no peace with these, but to be an iron pillar and a brazen wall against them, even to the last. How thou goest on I know not, but am fully persuaded that if the Lord makes thee useful, the devil will make thee miserable. He that eats the little book, hath honey in his mouth, and wormwood in his heart. The paschal Lamb and the bitter herbs, the bread of life and mingled wine, must go together. These exercise us, and make us feel for others, and teach us to know what is in our hearts, by harrowing up all the rebellion therein; and this leads us to see in the word of God, what he says to such sinners in such cases.
I hear thou art married, that thou hast got the one thing needful, seeing it is not good that man should be alone. You have agreed to put your troubles together to make one common stock of it. Be it so; live joyfully with the wife of my youth whom thou lowest. God bless you both, and al, the little flock.
So prays
W. H., S. S.
*